Yes it never comes like this. The cloud never opens up and no lightning strikes to make us successful suddenly one day. We don't become successful by accident. Most of my topics are related to success, I suddenly realized it now; Is this one thing I am confused about or I saw so many hungry faces for in pursuit for success eventually happiness? I don't know. One thing I can realize is most of us want to see ourselves successful in our life and there is no harm in it. We are here to do something worthwhile, seeing back in later days and wanting to praise ourselves, and pat our back. But the downside of being so success obsessed could be that we overlook bigger opportunities to be happy. Small gestures, small contribution towards someone's life, making them smile does not take a lot of success from us. I have seen so much dog eats dog in this life, so many passionate workers to go dull in their work, so many talents being wasted. Only reason they wanted success, the success defined by others. That's why I wish I could write things for the pursuit of happiness and become a happiness preacher. It would be so fun to put smile on the face that are longing for peace. If my little contribution can make difference to someone else's life, this is what I have been sent for. I wish I had one remote control, pushing it would make people happy and let them do whatever they always have wanted to do in their life. But as I don't see this remote control has been invented yet and scientist have no intention to invent it near future as well, we have to get up and start looking for the meaning of life -the life we have been sent for.
Three months of leisure and hanging out - how does it sound? Believe me it's true and well you will get paid at the same time. I know it sounds almost a dream but that happens and not only once that happened to me three times in a row. My undergraduate University used to give us a break for more than three months in every second semester of the year. This time you would know your result, you would know there is no class, no assignment or exam and you would have full time only to spend the way you would like. And in these months you will be paid the way you were used to. When I got the first time vacation I couldn't even feel that. In my undergrad we had the fastest semester possible. Only 4 months and six subjects did not give us much time to stretch. The day the class started we were like bee busy to get everything done. In between we had to give quizzes, assignments and labs and exams. Now when looking back I feel a little amazed - how did I finish it this way? I guess it's the Parkinson's law and surrounded with like minded friends made it possible. So many times I talked about my undergrad University because I feel this is the place which made me what I am, shaped me up in the core. So many good memories - so many good things to remember. Hours of chilling out, watching movies, listening songs, playing games all the things that make my life worth watching back.
Anyway I started with the vacation so I should be stick to that! So, the vacation came as a blessing to us. It was not mandatory to leave the dormitory during this vacation, so we used to be there, getting free foods three times, watching movies, playing tennis and hanging out - what more could we want for? The same corridor which became a deadzone during exam now turned to a noisy. We used to keep ourselves awake whole night and then go for breakfast in cafeteria. After having breakfast most of us would go for a long snooze. That would last till the lunch time and then the start of the game marathon or movie fiesta. Some of the very serious ones would start doing something with the lessons they had previous semster to make some robots and some would go to programming to brush up but we the 'lazy ones' would not miss the chance to take the shower in laziness and feel good resting. To me this three months of vacation actually made us more productive and made us ready to fight the frenzy 4 months war. Yah I would call it a war cause it almost made us crazy like being in a war. We were like co-fighters fought in that memorable war and survived. Ooh such a memory!
What is happiness to you? Or do you have your own formula to be happy? I wonder, as a human being how oblivion we are about the things that make us happy. On the other hand, we think we would be happy after achieving something and finally after getting it we don't feel as happy as we thought we would be! The intensity of our happiness fades away once we achieve it. So, we seldom know what makes us happy. But one thing is for sure that happiness is achievable. It's not your gene that prevents you to be happy. May be you need a little practice and self realization to know what makes you happy.
I feel, if we want to be happy we really don't need to be super achiever. It is within us, we just need to discover. Sadly mojor part of our happiness depends on the approval from others. We hanker for other's approval, their recognition to feel happy. Which we should avoid in the first place. The fulfilment after achieving something, which we tried to achieve for long, can give us happiness. We feel we have done something worthwhile, and again it can be anything: discarding the fear of electrocuted and then changing your bedroom light or putting your feet on moon as a hypsiphobic. Out from our comfort zone can be other thing. We usually find things are exciting and alluring once we get out from our comfort zone and try something new. This gives us an unbound joy to achieve something which we thought we were not capable of. Another way to find our 'happy-button' is to know the things we think we should achieve. Usually making goals and then try to reach there makes us happy. Downside of this ofcourse would be over ambition. Ambition is a great asset. We just need to know where and how to utilize it. Here comes the role of moderation to play. Everything should be in moderation to make ourselves happy, otherwise we would be caught up with boredom. So what are you waiting for, go get it!
Imagine a world where your richness is on your happiness - not on your wealth. Like, think it as a currency - national currency. What kind of person you would be then? What kind of job you would like to do to be rich? How much happiness you would give others for a transaction? Isn't it mind boggling? Isn't all our life we are actually trying to do the same but fail miserably by money? How much happiness you would spend to own a house, a fancy car or a sea side villa? But in that case we would be in a contradictory position. After buying that particular piece of house or car would make us happier - right? So, actually there would be no scarcity of currency. But there would be a catch. If you are too engrossed about getting happiness, which we are now for earning money, we eventually would be unhappy. And then we would be getting poorer. This hypothetical endeavour will be a scene to observe. We would be laughing all day at our work and would be given a healthy amount of happiness in return. We would love doing what interests us.
What would be your dream job then? For me it would be writing and listening music. I would be professional music listener and hobbyist writer. That sounds kind of funny and intersting. I would go to work to listen to the music I like only; would listen them thousand times and would be paid. I would be writing articles and would just be doing what I would feel doing. What a life! Why we just don't dump all the money out there and start this new currency!? What do you think?
While I started writing this topic, in back Ananda Shankar is playing his Missing you. Do I miss myself too? when in the dark night I feel I am empty inside, when the moon gets a little tired for being there so long, the snow stops dripping... I close my eyes and I see one young guy just passed his teen, looking past the corridor of his University residence. The spring breeze is giving a clue for the harsh winter, somewhere near some tiny animals are preparing themselves for the dawn, he is seeing the sky. The dark velvet over the skyline, few stars blinking with dead light, he is not very concerned nor so relaxed about his future. Things still to him, as good as it gets. Dreams got faded with the course of time and I am now sitting here after long 10 years thinking of giving some advice to this young me: No way you could get back these moments, save them. No way you could be so healthy, use it - go for jogging, play football, tennis, basketball - whatever gets you. Just don't sit back and let the time slips away. You really don't want to see yourself with some more extra pounds and some grey hair after few years. Studying is always good; no doubt, but realizing life and realizing that life is not only about education or revolves around success would give you more freedom to pursue your dream. Your dreams are there to shape you up as a person - not your education. I certainly am making this thing so straighten up but to me it's true. And again dream irrationally high, no one will put tax on your dreams. So spend time dreaming about where you really want to see yourself down in the road after 5 yrs, after 10 years, after 20 yrs. Make the plan and no way, no way at all, let other shape it up for you. Take the decisions which feel ok to you (I am glad I have taken some which failed in the middle, but can say my 30s self - I took the chance). Do not fear to handle any situation in your way or do not fear to be in conflict for which you feel you should stand. Your stance, your opinions, your decisions will make you the person you want to be. Enjoy the life, relax - you are not alone.
Documentaries are not something you would always like to watch. Sometimes you watch them and feel like you should have seen them way before. The following is one of them, but before that I would like to say something about it.
Racism is a core problem - from the start of the mankind. As a victim or as the culprit who causes it, we saw it. Differentiating someone for her skin color, race, ethnicity, beliefs, orientation, choice, inability is the worst part of human story you can play on. Sometimes the criminal lives in a dream world. They think this is how the world should go but one thing they are unable to understand that may be they are the one who should be judged or in a far extent being eliminated from everything. I always believe anyone can go as far as she wants. The courage determines the success, not the skin color or ethnicity or language or religion. We start making blunder when we tag them together and make a decision from our mindset.
And in this case the affected people and media has a better role to play. You just can't expect the neighbor starts appreciating your daughter's merit unless you start doing it in your home first. Corporate world, once again play a dirty role here. As a person someone should show more maturity as well. Using a fairness cream would not make you loveable, would not make you confident, would not change the job chance, would not make you a good person. It is within you and within your reach. If you really think you are a beautiful person, start believing it. Don't come in front of the mirror and praise how fair and beautiful you are. Your behavior and seeing the world eventually shows that to others and in a subtle way - to you. Grow up, see the world, appreciate it and help developing an affectionate one - not the opposite.
I would prefer to be self-obsessed. Don't get me wrong, few days back while giving a psychological test I found a question: "Are you interested in people?". That jolted me a little, seriously I AM interested in people, BUT I am certainly not interested in what he eats, what he wears or how he looks. Being interested is not interfering the life, rather seeing it from distance and not being judgmental. We seriously need to draw a line between being interferer and being interested in person. We seriously DO!
There is a red thin line between being self confident and being self-boasting-imbecile. I hope people could understand where is the line and mind to cross it. Being confident has nothing to do with being boastful as we all take it for granted. Everyone had gone through some of the pain, and when you are describing about your struggle, be assured no one cares YOUR struggling part. They will hear it, discard your heroic descriptions and pull the main idea of survival. Strangely enough we all had been through it - you gotta believe me!
From a long distance things seem so simple, so smooth, so easy..while you get into it you know how complex, how rough, how hard it is for you! We only hear success stories..either we overlook the failures or don't want to hear the struggling part. Do we have the myopia syndrome? the syndrome to appreciate only success passing behind all the hard works, struggles and sometimes failures one went through? Anyway my motto from the comment is: You can't get free lunch without working for it..one of the reasons behind it probably you can't take things for granted...you can't afford 'a fly in the ointment' in your life!
It is very unlikely me, I mean delving into some matters. I am almost like, being happy for whatever I am getting without giving it much thought. But while saw again the famous quote "Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans" and credited to John Lennon I felt an urge to see the authenticity. Internet is a great place but it's also a place where you will be given wrong directions and wrong information. I don't know but if it were said by someone else I would not be bothered may be, but Beatles had never been my cup of tea and so are the band mates. Well I came up with interesting fact that it was not the first time that this has been come out from John Lennon. Rather Adam Saunders wrote the line many years ago, Lennon used it in a song. Sigh of relief, hehe I know you guys must be mad by now, but hey while you are putting and associating with a particular quote please give the real one! At least show the creator a credit, now a days we are very interested in giving right credits, aren't we? Have a great day!
References: 1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allen_Saunders
I am kind of forgetful, most of the important dates which I should remember and wish, I forget. But still there are some dates which I can't, the story or the love behind this doesn't allow me to forget. My favorite singer's date of demise is one of them. Two years back he left this world leaving behind all his creations and remorse audience. He was used to be called King of Ghazal. I have already gave a little introduction about it in my previous post. I had very few milestones to cover, and most of them are not very over the top kind, but attending Jagjit Singh's live concerts was on the top of the list and I now know this milestone would never be crossed. A little bit of disappointment we all have, our share of disappointments make us the person we are. But some of them are too much to bear or forget or to just pass on. Some of the regrets or bereavements born to give you the prickly feeling of disownment - disownment of not having something even if you try your level best.
Why we always feel that we just had not done justice to the people around us? And strangely enough this feeling would not come to you when you are with these people. All the regrets come only when you are away from them. You were completely oblivion of the fact that you were doing wrong or not doing enough. And they come back once you are alone - when you are unable to repay it. The feeling is never pleasant. To me you actually don't think about the sins or good deeds you have done so far for your next life when you think about death or you are in a death bed. You die with regrets that how many people you hurt with your behavior or deeds, how many lives could be improved only if you had paid a little attention. This feeling is unbearable and may be one of the obvious we would be dying with. We will never be satisfied nor we will die peacefully. But when we are alive or closer with our relations we take it for granted. We believe what we are doing is good for us- which eventually is not. Our life, whatever success we achieve as a person, is a failure in the death bed. Inevitable!
A little heads up
The Blogorama is collection of my daily blog. Whereas category "Things made my life awesome" talks about my past wonderful experiences in an ascending order, "Now in my mind" says the issues I like my opinion on. "Life, in making" is recently started daily log (not so daily!), "Meditation" is something I come back so often, thought that would interest YOU too. Well, that sums it up (almost).
A constant dreamer, believe this is not the end of the world and try to make changes in my own life constantly. Life sometimes went hard and strict-my life's choices would determine whether I have taken them as lessons or punishment.
If you think someone else is the problem and is not letting you do certain things, that implies you perceive yourself a victim. Being victim is letting the person win. If you really want to make a statement: Ignore him.
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